{"id":20688,"date":"2024-02-27T17:14:50","date_gmt":"2024-02-28T01:14:50","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=20688"},"modified":"2024-02-27T17:15:22","modified_gmt":"2024-02-28T01:15:22","slug":"this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-2\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in entirely made up horoscopes"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>The signs go on a date&#8230;<\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Aries: silently takes notes to debrief with the besties later<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Taurus: kum n go\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Gemini: immediately exposes all of their red flags<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Cancer: Falls in love after being shown the absolute bare minimum<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Leo: has a mental breakdown and goes home.<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Virgo: Canceled last minute, berates themselves for making plans on a sacred friday evening<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Libra: goes way over the top and overwhelms their date<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Scorpio: Oh the date went well? Time to rent the U-Haul<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Sagittarius: Date so crazy our first stop was couple\u2019s counseling<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Capricorn: *stuffs breadsticks into pockets*<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Aquarius: doesn\u2019t make it through the door<\/span><\/p>\n<p><span style=\"font-weight: 400\">Pisces: I\u2019m way overdressed for hotdogs in the park<\/span><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"","protected":false},"author":1094,"featured_media":9131,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-20688","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-humor"],"modified_by":null,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20688","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1094"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=20688"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/20688\/revisions"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/9131"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=20688"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=20688"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=20688"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}