{"id":21951,"date":"2025-01-14T16:06:40","date_gmt":"2025-01-15T00:06:40","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/?p=21951"},"modified":"2025-01-14T16:07:36","modified_gmt":"2025-01-15T00:07:36","slug":"this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-11","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/this-week-in-entirely-made-up-horoscopes-11\/","title":{"rendered":"This week in entirely made-up horoscopes&#8230;"},"content":{"rendered":"\n<p>The Signs&#8217; New Year&#8217;s resolutions<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Aries: Try to listen better\u2026 only if everyone agrees I\u2019m right first<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Taurus: Actually socialize<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Gemini: become a hotter but worse person<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Cancer: get. it. together.&nbsp;&nbsp;<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Leo: Doesn\u2019t even bother making any, because there is no possible way to be more perfect<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Virgo: touch grass<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Libra: Embracing that <em>work life balance<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Scorpio: collect more shiny things<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Sagittarius: global domination<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Capricorn: deciding next year\u2019s resolution<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Aquarius: Stop spending over $100 at Trader Joe\u2019s<\/p>\n\n\n\n<p>Pisces: Becoming the best version of myself<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>The Signs&#8217; New Year&#8217;s resolutions Aries: Try to listen better\u2026 only if everyone agrees I\u2019m right first Taurus: Actually socialize Gemini: become a hotter but worse person Cancer: get. it. together.&nbsp;&nbsp; Leo: Doesn\u2019t even bother making any, because there is no possible way to be more perfect Virgo: touch grass Libra: Embracing that work life [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_seopress_robots_primary_cat":"none","_seopress_titles_title":"","_seopress_titles_desc":"","_seopress_robots_index":"","_lmt_disableupdate":"","_lmt_disable":"","_et_pb_use_builder":"off","_et_pb_old_content":"","_et_gb_content_width":"","footnotes":"","_links_to":"","_links_to_target":""},"categories":[25],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-21951","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-humor"],"modified_by":null,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21951","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=21951"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21951\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":21952,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/21951\/revisions\/21952"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=21951"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=21951"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/wou.edu\/westernhowl\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=21951"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}